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Feb 28

keep children out of social media during exams

Another update in 24 hours and I was wondering what is wrong with my nephew? Few minutes later, I see my neighbor coming up with one of his classy updates with equally classy snap. He is indeed blessed with the skill of writing. But is this the right time to showcase?

I understand social media can be a great place to relieve pressure. It feels much more like a calm environment. After all at home the temperature is rising. All the expectations and case studies of their cousins, friends, etc. been explained to them every single day; Ever since they took their first step in 10th. These days it is much prior. I agree.

It is such an irony! You are not allowed to drive till you are 18. You are not allowed to marry till you are 21 and then you are allowed to take more stress than while you drive at the age of 16. “There is tough competition outside” says a parent to simply tame the question. “Will putting up unnecessary stress and being over cautious help the cause?” I counter one.

If a child is spending more time on social media or chatting; it is because they find it the best place to be. A place where they are not thinking about the stress they have. Because the moment they have their books in hand they feel the stress of under performing and not living to the expectations. A graduate student or a manger would say, “I would never perform if I don’t have stress. If I have stress it gives me an urge to work.” But we need to understand that both the cases are totally different. In later case you work to earn a living and in former you perform because you need to grab a place for earning. Stress is a by-product of the aim you have. In case of children; stress is the by-product of imagining a chance to disappoint or fail.

We need to understand that they have long life to make it successful. Look at Boman Irani for instance. Fame, money and higher position can be achieved only with hard work and plenty of smart work. But stress is retardation to growth.

So the question is how we can ask our children to perform without being stressed? Here is the solution and you must try it out. Make it funnier for them. Motivate them. If you don’t know; try to visualize a wicket keeper standing behind the stumps. Trying to encourage the bowler every bowl even for the bad ones and guiding him where to bowl. Instead of telling him if you bowl here. The batsmen will hit you for a boundary and then you will lose your bowling line and then you will end up finishing your career early and you will have no money and then you will have to beg for your living. Now you just think does it make sense for a wicket keeper to walk down the pitch and tell all these to the bowler. The bowler would certainly bang the bowl in his head.

The former is mostly the way we talk to our children. Try the other way round. Encourage him for the bad day he had and say you have potential to do better. Spot his weakness and give him the solution on how he can improve. After all we don’t like an astrologer who tells us our problems and does not provide with a solution.

As a parent you have to be like a wicket keeper who encourages and an astrologer who provides solutions. The moment you do this without stressing out on the consequences, kids are meant to do well. Because then they will enjoy the success that they achieve at home and school more than the 10-15 odd likes they get on their updates.

Even kids need to understand we need more researches and innovations. We need more development. This is only possible when you learn. Not when you just try to score. Score is again the by-product of what you learn. So if you learn, absorb and reproduce you are going to do well. Kids you need to wake up before the results wake you up.

We need to understand when we grow old; today’s generation is going to build services for our old age. So we need to help them build a beautiful one.